– He’s really talentless, isn’t he?
– Sweetie, I know you feel have to drive him around to all these expensive lessons, because motherhood. Don’t do it. Break the patriarchy. Stay at home. The evening traffic will thank you.
– He tells me that holding the guitar makes his penis feel uncomfortable. What do you expect me to do with him?
– Violin? Violin? You are considering violin lessons? HAHAHAHAHAHA
– I am so sorry .
– There is nothing wrong with watching TV. Find a show you both like, and you can bond, too.
– Have you considered saving the money you are spending on these lessons, and getting a Netflix membership instead? They have some very funny kids’ shows.
– Video games?
– Have you considered saving the money you are spending on these lessons, and getting an Xbox instead? I hear you can play some good games, where you move around. Exercise.
– Never darken my doorstep with the shadow of your child again. Ever.