O A Marston
O proud defender of the the borders of the British isles
O noble visa officer, valiant child of Arthur and Robin Hood
O blue-eyed gold-haired red-skinned modern-day scholar and warrior, who we do not know is male or female,
You, carefully examining visa applications to that fair green emerald island
To make sure the hoards of rag-head dusky-skinned people, queuing outside the gates of your office, your Embassy-Castle
Do not wish to invade and attack and kill, merely to spends thousands of pounds
Shopping and studying or drinking and going to concerts
or whatever, but spending peacefully, first and foremost.
They swear to you, the rag-heads, that they have thousands of pounds in good white banks, in good white money, dollars and pounds
Not sanctioned nasty dirty money, which you sternly dismiss, as you cannot assess
That is enough for you, eagle-eyed British warrior
You have a noble soul, their promise of dollar-money to spend is enough for you, you require no more
You have a beautiful mind, raised on truth and pure white money, A Marston,
Soon it will be summer, and you will be sweltering under the hot eastern sun,
But sternly doing your duty, assessing that endless stream of visa applications, you sweat is cooled by air-conditioners, and does not sting your beady blue eyes,
Be careful, my truthful noble warrior of truth, A Marston.
You have made us very happy, and for that we bow low and we are grateful.
We will spend our dollars peacefully, we swear,
We love you, A Marston,
May you never be stabbed in the heart by a rag-head dagger.