Last night, as I was drifting off to sleep, I was planning my new blog post, with this title. And I was going to write about Axl as he stretched out his arm toward Dizzy and introduced him to the audience, the peculiar sweetness and affection in his voice, so unlike his snarls and hissy screechy wails, so unlike any other speech anyone ever heard him utter. “His voice is tuned by the devil” is a comment below that particular video, Indiana ’91, he’s singing “Estranged” to his former schoolmates and neighbours, and it’s true, his voice has a particularly harsh growl which is smoothed out in later versions and performances, and his face has a brilliant joyful edge, also transitory.
And then, I wanted to write about “Sympathy for the Devil”, both the original and the Guns n Roses cover, and how wonderful they were- “Anastasia- screams in pain”, and how hard it was decide which one I liked better.
And then, I was thinking about the cities where my brothers and sister now live, and how they’re all going to travel to one city and spend three days together, and how insanely happy this is making them, how those three days are going to be the most brilliantly joyful hard days ever, in the world, and how mad with jealousy I am at not being with them.
And then, I was going to write about how it is tue that I have made my own choices, and my life now is -well largely so- a result of those choices, and yet the element of choice does not lessen my rage and sorrow. The fact that I chose to travel to Halifax does not really ease the burden of separation. One can be happy and furious at the same time. Just look at Axl’s face, Indiana ’91.
“…but it’s getting much too late…..to find ourselves… so far apart…”