I am tired of seeing pretty intelligent educated smart funny well-dressed girls in their mid-to-late twenties, anxious and worried to death because… THEY HAVE NOT YET GOT MARRIED.

Strange society indeed, one which apparently richly rewards promiscuity and lots of of seks, but at the same time, girls feel such a horrible pressure to “Find The One” and get married asap. And be educated. And hold a job. And have at least two children. And make sure they’re clean healthy well-educated active love books love sports…

A successful relationship, for your nice middle-class Canadian girl, is one which leads to marriage. Amazing isn’t it? Here are Iranian girls, sitting in Iran, fantasizing about the wonderful free open lifestyles of those lucky lucky Western girls, who don’t need to wrap their heads and bodies in thick grey and black  cloth when they go to school, free to date openly and drink openly and then drink some more. Whereas in fact, all those lucky free Western girls want, yes, it’s so depressing I want stab something, is to snag a decent young man who isn’t too gross, who won’t actually bore her screaming mad on the first date, and can hold a steady job, and marry him.

What, I want to ask them, is so wonderful about marriage? Look at your divorced mums and dads, your courts, your deadly deadly boring suburbia. Are you afraid of loneliness? Are you so afraid of loneliness that you are willing to live with a grumpy greying chauvinistic-at-heart strange man whom you secretly (or indeed, not so secretly) hate FOR THE REST OF YOR LIFE? 

Sometimes I feel at the heart of society there lies a secret horrified dread of single uncommitted women, women who are not tied up to one man, for ever and ever. And so whole families, whole industries, whole swathes of books and literature are devoted to getting rid of this scary monster, the single woman who can sleep with whoever she wants, whenever she wants. Marry her off. Make her feel that if she is not married by the age of twenty-six, max, or in a long-term relationship which will lead to marriage in the foreseeable future, then something is wrong with her.

Dear girls. Take my advice: Study. Work. Earn money. Have children from an anonymous sperm donor. Make good friends. Go to the Gym. Have interesting hobbies. Ditch marriage. The most unneccessary thing in the twenty-first century.



  1. FoXy

    Wow! Love, love, love it!

  2. FoXy

    One of the best posts ever 😉

  3. Eva

    I totally agree and this caught my attention and I was thinking about it recently – about how many people feel that they hve to be married by the time thy’re in their 30’s or whatever, and have a house, two kids etc. etc. Why? Do it because that is what you truly want, not because you think you should! A marriage shouldn’t be based on that…

  4. mandana

    Unfortunately it doesn’t work in Iran!

  5. At 51 years old I am a dater only

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