i hate lady gaga

GAGA! GAGA! DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS??? IT MEANS CRAZY! HAHAHA! GET IT? GAGA-CRAZY! THAT’S ME! OH BOY, DO EVEN HAVE ANY IDEA HOW CRAZY I AM? LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME! WHAT DO YOU SEE? CRAZY! SHEER, PURE, NATURAL ONE HUNDRED PERCENT CRAZY!

THAT’S BECAUSE I’M SO TALENTED OF COURSE. SO SPECIAL. I MEAN, WHO ELSE COULD THINK OF WALKING AROUND IN THEIR UNDERPANTS? THAT’S JUST MY MUSICAL TALENT, YOU KNOW. MY SPECIALNESS.

GET THIS- I SLEEP WITH ALL MY BAND MEMBERS.

YUP. YOU HEARD ME. I’M JUST SUCH A SPECIAL TALENTED CRAZY GENUIS THAT I CAN’T MANAGE BORING ORDINARY ONE-ON-ONE RELATIONSHIPS LIKE ORDINARY NON-CRAZY NON-TALENTED PEOPLE, SO I JUST SLEEP WITH THEM ALL. ITS REALLY SO MUCH EASIER. YOU SHOULD TRY THAT TOO. ON SECOND THOUGHTS, NO DON’T TRY IT, BECAUSE THEN YOU MIGHT END UP AS TALENTED AS ME, PLAYING THE PIANO WITH A BARE BUTT, AND YOU DON’T NEED MORE LADY GAGAS. DEFINITELY NOT.

AND GET THIS, NOT ONLY DO I SLEEP WITH ALL MY BAND MEMBERS (DID I MENTION I SLEEP WITH ALL OF THEM? LIKE EVERY SINGLE ONE? ALL THE TIME?), JUST GET THIS- ARE YOU READY FOR THIS? IT’S REALLY HUGE- I DON’T KNOW WHETHER YOU CAN BEAR TO HEAR THIS BUT I’M GONNA TELL YOU ANYWAY:

I GOT LESBIAN VIBES.

DID YOU GET THAT? DID YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND THAT? DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT IT MEANS, YOU POOR NON-TALENTED ORDINARY PERSON WITH YOUR BORING MAN-WOMAN RELATIONSHIPS? LET ME SAY IT AGAIN, IN CASE YOU DIDN’T HEAR ME THE FIRST TIME: I GOT LESBIAN VIBES. LESBIAN. LESBIAN.

OF COURSE, THAT’S ALL BECAUSE I’M SUCH AN INCREDIBLE ARTIST. I EVEN GOT TO PLAY IN FRONT OF THE QUEEN AND ALL. I ACTUALLY PUT ON PANTS WHEN I WAS PLAYING IN FRONT OF HER MAJESTY- I DIDN’T WANT HER TO THINK I’M REALLY CRAZY, YOU KNOW.

LADY GAGA. LADY…………….GAGA. YOU JUST CAN’T HEAR ENOUGH ABOUT ME, CAN YOU? MY INCREDIBLE CATCHY TALENTED SONGS AREN’T ENOUGH FOR YOU, ARE THEY, YOU NEED TO PRY INTO MY SO-PRIVATE PRIVATE LIFE TO SATISFY YOUR OWN MEDIOCRE CURIOSITY, YOU BORING OLD UNTALENTED UNCRAZY PERSON WITH YOUR BORING RELATIONSHIPS AND YOUR OBSESSION WITH WEARING TROUSERS WHEN YOU GO OUT. SERIOUSLY, I MEAN WHO EVEN DOES THAT ANY MORE? EVEN PEOPLE AS BORING AS BEYONCE DON’T WEAR TROUSERS ANY MORE – EVEN BEYONCE GOES OUT WITH UNDERPANTS, SHE LEARNED IT FROM ME, YOU KNOW. BUT YOU, YOU JUST HANG ON TO YOUR TROUSERS. AND WATCH THIS SPACE TO LEARN SOME MORE CRAZY NEWS ABOUT THAT CRAZY LADY GAGA.

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4 comments

  1. FoXy

    Haha that was funny! And kinda true. I still can’t decide about her. I mean she looks n acts different, but she’s really ugly. Her style is sometimes cool n her songs are sometimes catchy n entertaining. One thing for sure, she’s much more fun than huge, big-boned, boring Beyonce in her cheap Golden dresses n thick eye brows.

    Well, these days I really like Pussy Cat Dolls. They’re fun n beautiful n sexy n stylish, esp Nicole Sherzinger.

  2. FoXy

    OMG I just searched some of her quotations, n Lady Gaga does consider herself as an ARTIST! OMG! It’s hilarious!

  3. hahahaha pretty hilarious. glad you read my blog post, thought Id do the same.

    Id find this one a bit more funny if you based it more specifically on stuff that she does, like her songs which i think are pretty ordinary and ripe for ripping on. Stuff thats unfounded (and speculative), like her sleeping with all her band mates is less funny cuz its not true (where did you even hear this?) so it comes across as you just making stuff up about her because you dont like. Just a word of advice 🙂

    overall you made me lol though.

    • thenewcomer

      Hi- I’m glad you enjoyed this- i have to say i spent some time this afternoon surfing your blog and i was really impressed by your stuff, the pics but also the words. I esp. enjoyed the lego dreadnought.

      About lady gaga sleeping with her band (oh god why am I even talking about this?) – well it’s one of her own quotes- she is actually quoted as saying ““I just sleep with the guys in the band all the time because it’s easier.”- just google it and it comes up on a dozen gossip sites etc.
      happy blogging!

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