Once upon a time, in the distant past, there was only me in the mornings, hurridly deciding what to wear, what goes with what, which shoes, which make-up, what is ironed and what is a bit smelly under the arms. For depsite what may come across as my obsession with what to wear at work, I never, ever belonged to that class of women who decided the night before what to wear on the day after, and made sure it was read and pressed for the morning.

Now there are two of us, which makes it fun in a way, but is also immeasurably more time-consuming. My daughter’s interest in her clothes and appearance is vastly greater than mine; I cannot remember being so clothes-conscious at so early age, and I can remember my poor mother trying to get me interested in my looks at the ripe old age of sixteen. It was only after clothes and make-up often became the only bright point in a dull or chaotic or exhausting office day that they began to command my attention.

Not so my daughter. Her love of looking good is innate, and needs no outside stimuli.  I spent 85 dollars yesterday in Walmart, sweeping up cheap but fun and pretty t-shirts and skirts. Each day, she wants a new look, and discusses it with me passionately. Seeing as her life in daycare has recently begun to resemble episodes in “The Bold and The Beautiful”, with intricate and detailed plots of who is friends with who, who wants to be friends with who, and who does not want somebody else to be friends with who, this interest is more than understandable. She herself is “friends” with one boy, but is very much interested in another one, who yesterday told her “she is pretty”, so she has high hopes of becoming “friends” with hmi soon, and ditching the other one…

This morning, she went out in a deep pink frilly ra-ra skirt, and bright yellow t-shirt with a pattern of multi-sized pink and orange sparkly butterflies. A deep pink baseball cap completed the look. Oh the poor boys…



  1. XXX

    You are an immoral and corrupting woman. You are only think of superficial shallowness, clothes and fashion. Now you are training your poor innocent daughter to be the same as you. You are proud that she is so small and thinking of boys and clothes and make-up???? You have gone to the West to walk outisde naked. To show your body to men. You are finished in evil. But it is so sad and terrible that you are doing same to your poor daughter.

  2. XXX

    And this is worse: you think you are BETTER than your daughter. You say you didn’t care about fashion when child. But you cannot see your daughter has no blame. She only copying evry thing she can see her mother do. It is obvious. She see you talking about clothes and she does the same. And you accuse her been “innate” interest in fashion. There is no innate interest. If you spend your time doing good things, she will do also. Very simple.

  3. ZT

    To XXX

    Everybody likes to look nice and beautiful, part of nature…. In Iran, women are forced to look the same to protect sick men!!!!! May be u got the point wrong!

  4. thenewcomer

    To XXX:
    Response no. 1 : Oh no! You are right! I am a bad mom! I knew it!
    Yes- you may have the satisfaction of knowing that your comments actually ring a bell with me- all moms feel they are doing something wrong with their children, not brushing their teeth enough, not giving them enough nutritious food, etc. So thank you for confirming my suspicions.

    Response no. 2: Just F*** off, you evil taliban witch, and go and raise your own daughter in a blue burqu. Shut up about what I should do with mine. We enjoy lovely clothes, so don’t read this blog if you don’t like that.

    Response no. 3 (defensive): I DO do good things as well; I read, I cook, I go for walks, I work. But none of them seem to make as much of an impression as dress.

    Wow- I have a complicated split personality, haven’t I???

  5. XXX

    It is typical of you brainwashed by West to give insults and swear when you can’t think of anything to say. You need psychologist, as you say. Also before you ruin your daughter.

  6. NotAFanatic

    I just wanted to point out to the newcomer and xxx that the issue of what little girls should wear to be attractive without slutty, and whether clothes for girls are becoming too sexualized is not one only for East vs. West cultures- you can find similar debates on lots of sites and blogs- the Slate was doing one recently. Many moms are concerned that they don’t want their little girsl to go out looking like miniature Beyonce and they do not want them to grow up idolizing Britney.
    New comer, think about it- do you really want your daughter to behave and dress like one of the hollywood starlets? This has nothing to do with Islam or Iran, you know.

  7. teng

    I love the fight…
    how did XXX find this blog?!
    I hope not through my blog…
    to the NotAFanatic:
    newcomer’s issue is not her child dressing up like beyonce. she says her daughter is maturing too early, is having feelings at age of 6 that she herself had when she was an adult.

    to XXX (and pretty much all Moral humans)
    oh my god
    read some books
    watch some movies
    arent you tired of repeating the same stuff
    arent u tired of being humiliated and ridiculed for your thoughts, speech, looks, fashion… (and the list goes on)?
    even if u r a GOOD theist (which I am not, BTW), u should know better that only god has the knowledge to JUDGE people. How dare you throw words like “immoral” and “corrupting” to other people you know only through a blog?
    I hate judgemental people.
    dont judge, live your life, dont like something: turn away, stop picking on everyone, putting your nose eveywhere, spreading your moral codes. Go pray or do whatever you do with your fellow MORAL pals.
    I’m so fed up with this moral spreading and judgments. I fled to Canada, and still you see them… everywhere… we should immigrate to Mars i guess

  8. thenewcomer

    Hey teng- leave XXX alone- it perfectly ok for her (or him- but she sort of sounds like a woman- I don’t know) to scream insults in cyberspace, that’s what it’s here for. I’m sure in real life she’s a perfectly respectable … what? religious studies teacher, or no… let’s be a bit more imaginative…after all she writes pretty fair English… newspaper journalist…

    One point though: if I’m so interested in clothes, why did I migrate to the West to run around naked? 😉

    Another thing: s/he obviously doesn’t know much about Canada, or geography in general, otherwise she would have realised Iranians who want to run around naked migrate to Australia, not Canada.

  9. scentedswamp

    Oh … Please delete the sick comments of that muslim bitch… Let us have some peace in our own blog at least… Why do these people/animals still exist on our planet?!

  10. thenewcomer

    To the swamp: NO WAY! first time for years, (so it feels) somebody is actually commenting on my entries instead of just reading and running away and she is livening up the place a little- and you tell me to delete her entries!!! And what is this about OUR blog- this is MY blog- you have your own blog- do you want me to send XXX around to your place and leave some comments for you too? perhaps if we ask her politely?

  11. scentedswamp

    :)) … come on… her first comment almost made me cry… these people (animals) sound really cruel … they have no right to come and vomit their repressed emotions and childhood complexes on OUR blog!

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